Addicted

Coming off of two excellent race weekends has me all messed up - like, it's making me think I actually enjoy running! ;-)

I registered for the Go! St. Louis Half Marathon in April!

Now my challenge will be not losing all of the fitness I have gained in the last several months. I have yet to sit down and make a plan, but I know I want to keep some long runs (several a month) in my schedule.  Who knows, maybe I'll do a half marathon training run and run the full 13. 

I've done this race before. It wasn't my most shining moment. But I'm coming to realize it wasn't about the course or the race - it was about my training and my mental place. It was about the way I fueled myself and the way my mind worked during races back then.  I am in a different place now (and they've apparently changed the route now, phew!) I have decided to give it another try. 

If anyone wants to join me, you are welcome! ;-) I always love to have people to run with during races!

Crossroads.

I've been sitting here, staring at a blank screen for about a half an hour. I'm researching, reading and thinking through my next steps. 

I've completed a Whole30.  When it was over, I fell off the wagon.  No, I take that back, I swan dove off the sucker.  We left for vacation and never looked back.  I spent a month with little restriction (although I will say, we aren't usually very far from at least a "clean" eating plan) and gained back all of my weight, felt awful, etc. 

So I started another Whole30 (intending to do a "Whole14") last Friday.  Today is Day 5. I'm feeling good, but my anxiety is THROUGH THE ROOF. Not sure if it's W30 related or just life in general.  I had no headaches, I'm getting stuffy again (my whole family got horrible colds about week 2 last time), but I'm having no lightheadedness this time. 

But that brings me to my food today.  Eggs with bacon mixed in, avocado and coffee.  Lunch (was STARVING - had a 570 cal burn workout then took the kids swimming!) 1/2 spaghetti squash with homemade marinara & meatballs, salad with olives and Tessamae's balsamic dressing and a bowl of applesauce with cinnamon.  I made "ice cream" for my kids - frozen watermelon, coconut water and a touch of coconut milk for creaminess. (NOTE: THIS IS NOT WHOLE30 COMPLIANT, even if the ingredients are. It's SWYPO!)  I had some - you know why? Because I'm slowly realizing, I need to learn to live within my guidelines. Maybe finding an amazing delicious summer treat (that isn't "real" ice cream) will help me stop feeling "left out" of all the occasions that there is REAL ice cream.  

I was faced again with one of these situations at dinner. I went to get my co-op produce and left hubby and kids to make dinner. They put together a DELICIOUS chicken salad. My almost-6 year old made most of the salad herself - peeling carrots and shredding them, putting cheese on them and adding olives. When I walked in, she stopped me at the door and, with the saddest eyes ever, said "Mommy -- I accidentally put cheese on your salad."   Now I had two options - 1) try to pick all the shredded cheese off the salad to "preserve" my Whole30 (which would have broken my daughter's heart) or 2) Go with it knowing that I do NOT react to dairy (thank you, first Whole30). I chose #2. Because you know what, sometimes, food will have ingredients that I don't know about. Sometimes I will choose to eat "non compliant" food. Sometimes I will WANT to eat non compliant food. 

So I will continue to eat "Whole30" but I will use the remainder of my 2 weeks to keep my eyes open for opportunities for moderation.  Some accidental cheese, a paleo treat with my kids... 

I just can't continue the cycle I'm on - Whole30, junky eating, Whole30, etc. I don't believe it was intended to be used this way and I want to try to get to the root of my eating issues. I'm hoping to be more MENTALLY aware this time than I was last time. 

Sorry if a lot of this post is rambling - I really don't know where I stand or what my plan is going forward, but getting it "on paper" will really help me!

Jamie Eason's LiveFit Training Program

After my colossal fitness failure two weeks ago, I sat down to do some serious thinking about what I want out of my workouts.   I love love my circuit classes, kickboxing and spinning, but I don't know that they are what I NEED right now.  My ultimate goal is to drop my body fat to about 20% and to get my weight back to around 153.

Some research led me to www.bodybuilding.com to find a workout plan.  I stumbled on Jamie Eason's LiveFit training program and figured I might as well give it a shot, it certainly seemed to work for her. :-)

I completed 3 of the 4 Week 1 Workouts already (day 4 will be tomorrow!) and so far? I feel awesome!  The hard part is that in phase 1 there is NO cardio!  SO brutal for me. So brutal that the first day, it took me 19 min to do the whole workout.....   and it was unthinkable to just LEAVE the gym, so I did my treadmill interval workout from the previous week, 4.17 miles. Oops.  Tuesday I was able to do the lifting and leave (23 min) and Thursday I did Day 3 (and spinning).  I think for where I am and what I want to accomplish, a little cardio during the plan won't hurt me.

Clean eating is a big part of this plan too.  I've been trying to stay as clean as I can. I'm working on bulking up my veggies and paring down my carbs.   Which reminds me ....


I had a discussion with one of the trainers (who runs) at the gym and told her about the high protein macros I was following. She told me that the way I work out, there is NO WAY 15% carbs would fuel my body the way I need to be fueled. She explained that is probably why I couldn't even hold a side plank by Friday a few weeks ago.  So I researched macros for runners and found a better balance at 45% carbs, 30% protein, 25% fat.  Those numbers have been a lot more realistic for me and my workouts have felt MUCH better!

I have a bunch of food porn pictures, but I'll save that for my next post! 

Do you have any phenomenal ways (that aren't smoothies) to get more green in your day? 

August Challenge!!

I'm a day late, of course, because isn't that my style? :-) 

So my August challenge started, duh, August 1. 

July challenge results: I lost a lb from July 1. 

But since I was injured I will take it. 

BUT - August? August is MY month.  My official weigh IN weight was 156.5. LOW for me lately, but I am really ready to kick it into gear. I have another awesome partner (my friend Stacy) who has already motivated my butt to get moving this month! 

I am making it a goal to run several times a week - I am going to be running the Halloween 10K again (third year in a row!) with my friend Courtney and I am PSYCHED! I also signed me and my hubby up for the Color Run in St Louis coming up. And kids 5 and under run free - so both of my kids are coming with us! They will be SO psyched :-)  Not running it, obviously, but it will still be an awesome family time for us.

I'm excited that we're camping more often. I can usually max out at 10K or more steps on camping trips, even just walking to and from the bathroom with my kiddos. I'm sure I cancel that out with the amount of beer I drink when we camp, but I still think it counts for something.

This week:

I ran 2.25 miles on Thursday. (11:25 pace)

I ran 1 mile today (10:28 pace)

Here's to speeding my pace up this month. 

Here's to losing the last few pounds that are hanging around  (I'm 156.5 this am; would like to get to 153!)

Here's to cleaning up my eating - not necessarily to completely "clean" eating, but to eating what is good for me. Eating what I know fuels my body, not necessarily what tastes good. 

Pinterest!

So here goes nothing! I am ready, dedicated and super busy this month. Plus my BABY starts KDG in 10 days. TEN DAYS I will have a kid in elementary school. It blows my mind how fast time is going. And all I really want is to be healthy for my family. I always tell them they are stuck with me forever and I want to make good on that one! 

Accountability (AKA What I Need)

I need to get my butt in gear. Seriously people, I weighed in at 160 this week. NOT a pretty sight. I am going to make this a priority now.

New Rules

• Bedtime will be 9pm on Monday, Tuesday, & Wednesday. 
• Alcohol will be two nights a week (it's been getting a little out of hand! Definitely part of the lbs being packed on!)
• If I miss a day of working out, I WILL NOT throw in the towel 
• Same as above, if I don't keep a PERFECTLY clean day, I will NOT take comfort in the candy dish. 
• Goal: 15,000 steps/day. If it means I march around my house for an hour before bed, so be it. 

Monday: Circuit & Kickboxing

Tuesday: Insanity AM

Wednesday: Insanity AM

Thursday: Insanity AM or during the day

Friday: Off

Saturday: Run

Sunday: Insanity

My reality check for the day: 

June 9, 2013

Heck, forget a year ago. Here's a few WEEKS ago:

So it'll take me longer, since I'm working now. 

Scheduling will be critical to my success. Working only 20 hours a week seems like I should be able to work out before or after work without getting in the way, but I am NOT a morning person so going to the gym before 8 is probably a no-go.  I tried leaving work at 2pm on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, but I CAN'T do it. I have a problem leaving work in the middle of a project. And around 2pm? I seem to ALWAYS be in the middle of something! 

So I will set an alarm. Maybe 2.

I WILL get up those mornings at 4:30 and do Insanity. 

I WILL get back to clean eating so that I can stop feeling like gross trash. 

I can't keep being surrounded by people who are rocking it without doing my fair share of rocking. So here goes. I miss being one of the rock stars. It's time to ditch the lazy attitude I've had and the bad eating habits. It's time to feel GOOD again and I am the ONLY person who can make that happen.  

I know I CAN do it. I just need to get up and go to actually ACCOMPLISH it. And I will. I've lost 30+ lbs in the last 2 years. Staying at goal weight has been the hardest part of the whole journey!

So here's to goals. And dreams. And being healthy. And teaching my KIDS about healthy eating and a healthy lifestyle!

A Must-Read

I have body image issues. Obviously, it's been years and I'm still not "there" (where I want to be, wherever that is.) I swing from overly concerned to completely unconcerned but still self loathing.  I do try, especially now that I have an almost-5-year old daughter, not to be "obvious" about it. I do not want her to have the image issues that I have. 

My mom sent me this article today, Passing On Body Hatred. It was really hard for me to read this because I can identify with so much of it. I spend a lot of time trying to teach my daughter about a healthy lifestyle that includes smart choices with regard to food and keeping active. She's run several races of her own, she LOVES her "running outfit" and I hope that those are the things she is remembering. 

But I can't hide everything. Changing three times before work because nothing fits right, lamenting that I haven't worked out in X amount of time and sometimes being just downright disappointed in myself for my progress (or lack thereof). 

This is a great reminder to me to be mindful of not only how I treat my daughter but how I treat myself in front of her. 

How do you approach a healthy lifestyle with your kids?