Day 5 and Done.

 Day 5

M1: Cherry pie Lara Bar

M2: 2 hot dogs, 1/2 avocado, pineapple

M3: BBQ cobb salad with no cheese or dressing. Confident that there was sugar in the bacon and the rub on the chicken. 

By M3, I had realized I was probably done with Whole30. I had barely eaten that day and forced myself to eat. I promised myself I would quit if I hit two conditions - skipping meals or the loss of 5lbs. 

Well, yesterday I hit the "no appetite, would skip meals" place. Then this morning, when I stepped on the scale, I had hit the 5lb loss. 5lbs in 5 days ORDINARILY would be amazing.  No appetite and no cravings ORDINARILY would be awesome. But right now in my pregnancy, those aren't things I am looking for.   I am done with Whole30-ing until after the baby comes. I am not worried about my weight gain so there's no reason to do it for that. I am hoping to keep my sugar cravings under control so that I don't get to the binging place that I was at before I started this. 

So, on to the next thing. I am continuing to move, not FAST but I'm moving!  I honestly can't WAIT to get back to hard runs, Jamie Eason's LiveFit training and a real Whole30 once things settle down around here! 

T-14 Days!

It was a good week for me to be a runner! 

Thursday I headed to the park for that "no more than 4 mile" run I mentioned when I last posted.  I have found that I am better with out-and-back runs - the certainty of knowing where I stop, the "run home" that always gets me moving - they just work for me. So with four miles in mind, I started running. I hit 2 miles, though, and was making such good time and felt good, so I said what the heck, let's go for 2.5 before the turnaround. 

I ran most likely my FASTEST 5 miles EVER on Thursday!! I felt good! I know I can SPRINT that fast, but I can't usually go for longer distances with that pace. I was on a such a high knowing I had it in me to run that! 

Sara has having some foot and leg pain so she was unable to do our first taper run this week. Hoping she rests up and gets better (only TWO WEEKS until the MO' Cowbell race!) in time for the race!  I seriously considered just not going this morning.  My family was out late last night seeing our favorite Beatles cover band, I had a few drinks, stayed up late to finish some laundry, etc.  Sara and I have been meeting at 6:30! That means I've been setting an alarm for 5:45 (and getting up around 6 ;-).  I told myself last night I would "sleep in" and set my alarm for 6:30.  I contemplated rolling over as "Sunday morning" started playing, but I got up anyways.   I was running a little behind my own schedule but still forced myself out the door.  

I despise the first mile, mile and a half, two miles of a run. Is that just me?! They are SO hard, drudgery and if it were up to me, I would quit during that part every time (is this why I see so many people RUNNING before RACES??). I feel heavy, clompy, slow and in pain for easily that long. Once I pass through that, I can ease into a rhythm.

  

Apparently, I excel at "the turnaround."  If you look back at my runs, especially recently, more often than not I get faster the further I am into my run!  My "turnaround mile" is usually one of my fastest (my last few runs my last mile has been my speediest of all.)  I love having my Garmin and being able to analyze the data from my runs. It gives the number-geek in me a chance to shine. :-) 

Total stats for today looked good! I cut 4 minutes off the 8-miler time from August 31st, so that gives me a small hope that I am improving, even slightly.  

I took Terrie's Friday morning cardio class this week and didn't fall to the back of the pack like I have been in recent months. THAT felt good too! The class had the equivalent to **34** flights of stairs on Friday - it's an amazing workout! Another "NSV" on my journey. 

My IT band has been acting up today, so I am going to scale back this week. Yoga and a run around my neighborhood (slow and low mileage) on Tuesday, hopefully a quick run Wednesday and Thursday will be Yogalates and another quick neighborhood run. Sunday I am planning on a 6 mile run as my *gulp* LAST taper run!! I can't believe the race is coming so quickly! I can't believe how excited I am for this race!! 

Now to make myself a Uni-Kitty costume for the Halloween 10K! 

Better this time!!

 I am not feeling the lightheadedness or dizziness that I felt during my last Whole30!  I expected that by today (day 4) I would have started to hit my carb wall like I did last time. Nothing doing! I ran 3 miles in 30 minutes today then I jumped on the elliptical for 30 more minutes. I've been eating well, of course.  

Not feeling too terribly bad, except I did have to make a cake for my daughter's school - My FAVORITE cake - a blueberry coffee cake. It's SO many different Whole30 no-no's and it was EVERYTHING I had not to lick the batter off the spatula while I cleaned up!

Breakfast: 3 eggs, bacon, power greens

Lunch: Chicken breast, sugar snap peas, olives and watermelon.

Snack: handful of blueberries. 1 small spoonful of coconut butter

Dinner: Grassfed burger, sauteed zucchini, avocado and baked fries.

My La Croix grapefruit is my "reward" for not killing anyone. .. . Day 3 in the history books!

Day 4: 

Breakfast: 2 eggs, 2 slices of bacon, power greens and watermelon

Lunch: Half a grass fed burger, Applegate hot dog (been worried about getting in enough protein!), pickles, romaine with Tessamae's balsamic dressing, blueberries. 

Mid afternoon: (acting as a post workout meal even though I worked out this am) 1/2 small sweet potato, small spoonful of coconut butter

Dinner: giant massive stir fry with cauli-rice. I have found the BEST way to make it!!!

Workout: ran 3 miles in 30:27, Elliptical for another 30 minutes.

Day 4: Success!!! I'm not having the lightheadedness that I had last time. I am going to chalk that up to going off an antidepressant along with starting Whole30.

Decision Time!

As I mentioned before, I have been looking at options for the next 6 weeks (exactly 6 weeks from today, eeek!)

And I finally settled on my plan.

I am starting another Whole30 tomorrow.  I know to people who haven't completed or attempted one that this looks ridiculous. I hated it, it was HARD to complete and there are so many rules - but I've never felt better in my LIFE. 

This isn't a desperate attempt to lose weight, it isn't a "get thin quick" trick. It's a total-life decision. I had no pain, I was STRONGER and I could more easily control cravings and my emotions!  A Whole30 is just that - 30 days. Temporary.  I am going to track my calories this time, though, only to make sure I am getting sufficient carbs to support my half marathon training. 

If my training suffers for much longer than 2 weeks, I will definitely bail, but my research all shows once your body is fat adapted, running only gets stronger. 

I will say here (and I'll say it again, as I'm sure I'll be posting more food pictures!) that I am going to allow myself dairy 1x a day - in my coffee. Only because I just purchased and opened a brand new half gallon of organic Horizon half and half yesterday... :-)   And from my previous W30 I know I don't have any issues with dairy. 

So.... bring it on, 30 days.   My new mantra: I can do anything for 30 days. 

Today I woke up and at 6:25 the temperature was already around 85 and the humidity was over 70% so I decided I would hit the treadmill (DREADMILL!) later today instead of slogging through 8 mile in the humidity. I have run this interval training a few times now but today was the first time I actually finished it! 

I "dumb down" the speeds, usually about .5-1 on each. I am not in a place to sustain those speeds for that amount of time just yet, but I am improving!! I can feel it, so it won't be long before I am able to do this workout unmodified. 

Tomorrow I will be going to a foam rolling class at one of the local running stores. I am excited to learn different ways to attack my IT band and to use my foam roller more effectively! 

Here goes nothing, friends!! 

Transformation Tuesday (on a Wednesday)

(said in WyldStyle's voice, of course...) 

Feb 2011 - July 2014

Sometimes, I just need a reminder of how far I've come. 

Sloth.

Seriously in a phase of sloth in my life.  I haven't worked out in over a week. I haven't watched my food intake *at all.* It's birthday week for my daughter and I have been in crafting and food purgatory. The parade was Friday, which means my house is FULL of Tootsie Rolls and banana Laffy Taffy.... 

but I'm sick of it. I'm sick of myself! I am going to give myself through to slip and have treats, but come Sunday? I'm doing a short Whole30 before a quick road trip with my kiddos. I need to get back to the gym (that will probably not happen until Monday but I'm going to try to make it happen this week).  I have joined a few new fitness motivation groups, but I'm feeling all guilty because I just.don't.care this week. 

I still struggle with binging. And self image. And moderation. Ohhhhh moderation, you are SO elusive to me!! I thought my Whole30 would help, but it obviously hasn't. 

I have been intending to up my cardio work, with two races coming up in October, but I haven't yet. After we get home from our road trip, it's on! Cardio rat here I come. 

The week we return, my kids are both in summer camp. I am going to try - regardless of the weather! - to get running again. OUTSIDE. This fall, both kids will be in school on Tuesday and Thursday - I will have those days for long runs (oh Heavenly fall long runs!!).  I intend to PR in a SERIOUS way on these races! 

My plan is already to do another Whole30 for the month before the races. It's not a sustainable lifestyle for me, but I can definitely manage it for a month if it's going to get me that PR!! 

So for now, S-L-O-T-H. I am going to get back to it, I really am. This is NOT who I am (except for birthday party week :-)  I'll post about that on Monday because who DOESN'T need to see pictures of another Frozen party ;-) 

Crossroads.

I've been sitting here, staring at a blank screen for about a half an hour. I'm researching, reading and thinking through my next steps. 

I've completed a Whole30.  When it was over, I fell off the wagon.  No, I take that back, I swan dove off the sucker.  We left for vacation and never looked back.  I spent a month with little restriction (although I will say, we aren't usually very far from at least a "clean" eating plan) and gained back all of my weight, felt awful, etc. 

So I started another Whole30 (intending to do a "Whole14") last Friday.  Today is Day 5. I'm feeling good, but my anxiety is THROUGH THE ROOF. Not sure if it's W30 related or just life in general.  I had no headaches, I'm getting stuffy again (my whole family got horrible colds about week 2 last time), but I'm having no lightheadedness this time. 

But that brings me to my food today.  Eggs with bacon mixed in, avocado and coffee.  Lunch (was STARVING - had a 570 cal burn workout then took the kids swimming!) 1/2 spaghetti squash with homemade marinara & meatballs, salad with olives and Tessamae's balsamic dressing and a bowl of applesauce with cinnamon.  I made "ice cream" for my kids - frozen watermelon, coconut water and a touch of coconut milk for creaminess. (NOTE: THIS IS NOT WHOLE30 COMPLIANT, even if the ingredients are. It's SWYPO!)  I had some - you know why? Because I'm slowly realizing, I need to learn to live within my guidelines. Maybe finding an amazing delicious summer treat (that isn't "real" ice cream) will help me stop feeling "left out" of all the occasions that there is REAL ice cream.  

I was faced again with one of these situations at dinner. I went to get my co-op produce and left hubby and kids to make dinner. They put together a DELICIOUS chicken salad. My almost-6 year old made most of the salad herself - peeling carrots and shredding them, putting cheese on them and adding olives. When I walked in, she stopped me at the door and, with the saddest eyes ever, said "Mommy -- I accidentally put cheese on your salad."   Now I had two options - 1) try to pick all the shredded cheese off the salad to "preserve" my Whole30 (which would have broken my daughter's heart) or 2) Go with it knowing that I do NOT react to dairy (thank you, first Whole30). I chose #2. Because you know what, sometimes, food will have ingredients that I don't know about. Sometimes I will choose to eat "non compliant" food. Sometimes I will WANT to eat non compliant food. 

So I will continue to eat "Whole30" but I will use the remainder of my 2 weeks to keep my eyes open for opportunities for moderation.  Some accidental cheese, a paleo treat with my kids... 

I just can't continue the cycle I'm on - Whole30, junky eating, Whole30, etc. I don't believe it was intended to be used this way and I want to try to get to the root of my eating issues. I'm hoping to be more MENTALLY aware this time than I was last time. 

Sorry if a lot of this post is rambling - I really don't know where I stand or what my plan is going forward, but getting it "on paper" will really help me!

Final Stats from Whole30

I learned today that PEAS aren't allowed on Whole30. I truly had NO idea. So if you're looking to do one, don't eat peas!  

Aside from the whole "no peas" thing,  we finished a successful (as far as we knew) Whole30! 

Here are my stats ! 

 I've had more energy, I have successfully weaned myself from an antidepressant and I feel stronger. I didn't have the amazing results I've seen around the forums and Whole30 sites, but to be honest, I didn't have a ton of weight to lose to get to goal. I hoped to get closer to my goal weight, but I can't turn my nose up at a 6.5 lb loss in a month. 

I think I've said it here before, we won't be paleo after this - it's just not sustainable to us. Unless we find that someone in our family reacts poorly to something during reintroduction, we will return to "clean eating." My husband and I agree that this is an excellent "reboot" and we will try to complete 2 Whole30's per year. 

I won't even go so far as to say everyone should do this. It's NOT for everyone. But if you feel that you need a good body reset, if you feel like you have inflammation or AI issues, if you feel like you need CONTROL of it for awhile - this is for you.  I didn't hit my goal weight. I didn't even lose as much as I hoped, but I also am a lot closer to my goal than someone coming from a SAD (standard American diet) because of the small changes we've gradually made over the years. It's been hard for me not to compare my results to ALL THE OTHER people who have completed a Whole30. "Why didn't I lose that much?" "Why didn't I get the tiger blood feeling?"  But I can't do that. I am not them. They are not ME! 

I can only go so far as to be proud of my 6.5 lbs, my 1.1% body fat loss, the teeeensy tiny abs I see in my "after" pictures. The fact that I am off an antidepressant I've been on for as long as I can remember. That I don't NEEEEEEED coffee to get me moving in the morning (in fact, most mornings lately, I FORGET to make a cup until around 10am!) 

It's completely embarrassing to put these pictures out publicly, but I am proud of where I am now. I admit, the fact that there are baby abs pushing through in the bottom left picture is a little addicting and I want to keep moving in that direction.  We are a few days out now and I've been adding in "prohibited" foods - I feel them. I have been more bloated-feeling and I miss the feeling of thinning out. I am going to try to start making a conscious effort to get back to tracking macros (without such a RIDICULOUS number for my protein!) and go back to a "clean" approach - with whole grains and lots of starchy carbs instead of processed stuff. 

I've missed a few days of the Jamie Eason plan - and I'm ok with it. It was getting to be a LOT of time spent at the gym, when I really needed to be spending more with my kiddos (you know, the reason I left my job?).  So I'm spacing out the workouts a little more. I am going to complete day 61 tomorrow, which is the 5th day of week 9. Today is technically the 2nd day of week 10, so I am only 4 days behind. 

I am going to start adding some running into the mix too. I registered for the Halloween 10K (fourth year in a row!) and the Mo' Cowbell Half again for this fall, so I need to get my butt in gear! I registered my expected finish time for the half to be 2:15!! 6 min shorter than my last! So I have a lot to prove - if only to myself. 

So as always, I finished up one thing and I'm on to the next. We will revisit the Whole30 concept again, hopefully a few times a year. If NOTHING else, it's a good reminder that I DO possess will power. I CAN control my eating, I can accomplish what I set out to do. 

Ooooohhhh boy.

Loving my FitNut family this month!

Start: 170

First weigh in: 167.5

Second weigh in: 166

It's still a good 10lbs over where I'm comfortable, but I'm at least going in the right direction finally. 

I have been using my Garmin inside for activities like my cardio and circuit classes, having dance parties with my littles and playing Wii Zumba (411 calories burnt today, whoop whoop!).  Tomorrow, with the temperatures supposedly hitting mid 50's, I am looking forward to getting outside for a run! 

Goals for this week: 

1. MORE VEGGIES! 
2. More consistent eating - I've found that on days I work out, I'm at less than a net of 1200 calories by bedtime. Which leads me to eat crap to "make up" my calories - NOT what I need to be doing! One of my teammates just suggested dividing my daily caloric allowance to give me a meal "goal". I think this is a great idea! I am going to try to actually stick to this!   
3. Working out 3 times at the gym/outside, 2 times at home.  Just need to get the miles in, especially since we're having a little challenge to see who can log the most miles this week!

So to accomplish #1, I am going to make sure I have salad prepared so I have NO excuses not to serve it with every meal. I have to maximize my intake, especially since we've gotten some AMAZING co-op deliveries lately! 

#2 will be more difficult. If I divide my daily calories (1720) by 4, I get 430 calories per meal. 430 calories for BREAKFAST!??  That will be a huge challenge!! I am definitely going to be challenged by this one.  Then will be attemping 2-215 calorie snacks.  This is my BIGGEST goal for the week. 

#3 should be pretty easy. My daughter is off school on Monday and has a half day on Friday but I should be able to get my workouts in for sure!

So while I'm not thrilled, I'm still at it!! 

Virtual Race - FitNuts/September

FitNuts had another virtual 5K! The last weekend in Sept, the day we got home from vacation. 

Not my best time, but it was a huge NSV for me. I was having a horrible awful day mood-wise. Instead of turning to food, I left my house and went for a run. It wasn't my best 5K time - but it was still a victory for me. 



I skipped my run Monday, I knew I wouldn't be able to fit it in with going back to work. Tuesday was just a quick 1.5 miler. I have a half marathon on Sunday 10/5 so I didn't want to push myself TOO too hard.  Tuesday while running I twisted my ankle on a stick on the sidewalk. Thankfully it wasn't a long term hurt but it surprised me and slowed down my pace.  

Wednesday I headed to the Y and did my favorite cardio plus and Circuit classes. I hurt myself (MY FAULT, TERRIE, NOT YOURS! :-) ) so I took Thursday off. 

Friday I took a quick run just to keep comfortable. My hips were tight, my calves hurt and my feet were sore. My lower back was so incredibly sore but I made it 1.5 miles. 


 Saturday my family went apple picking. MAYBE one of my most favorite times of year :-)  We picked over 50 lbs of apples! Insane! I couldn't stop getting them, they were so big and lovely!! 


7/13

Just a reminder to myself & maybe you too!

Someone posted this on my FitNuts challenge page today. 

It's perfect for today - no run and I wanted to (and practically did) eat all.the.things. 

Jen's Hitched! (Oh yea, & some fitness stuff...)

Our very own Jen has had a lot going on in her life :-)  

Most recently (as in, last night) she got MARRIED!!!  It was the most beautiful day and one of the most perfect weddings I've been a part of in my life! <3 

Friday morning, before the festivities, I went to what is NORMALLY the Friday cardio plus class. But the gym is having the room we have class in cleaned and polished (as they do every year) and we were "homeless." Never fear, our awesome trainer Terrie took us - bah bah buuuuuum - OUTSIDE.  It was 86 degrees, felt like 96 and 58% humidity!  Here's what my FitBit told me at the end of class: What it MEANT was "you idiot, why are you outside in this weather?!?!"  teehee. 

That night was the rehearsal dinner (delicious) and the girls and I stayed at a hotel with Jen so we could get up BRIGHT and early on Saturday for girly prep time before her big day.   I warned the girls before the evening started - it's the last day of the month tomorrow morning, which means i have a weigh in. Which means I brought my SCALE to the hotel. Yes ma'am, that's me. Walking through Ameristar casino with my duffle bag full of - scale. 

My final weigh in for August was 158.  I weighed in the first of the month at 156.5. Of course.

The wedding was gorgeous. There was so much love throughout the whole event, it was amazing. Jen has the most awesome parents who went above and beyond to make it an amazing event, a great party and definitely something to remember! 

I ate dinner, I had drinks, I ate TWO pieces of cake! 

And then I weighed in this morning. 

Lower than last month's initial weigh in. 

*face palm*

So.... this month's plan:

*Eat clean - goal - 75-80% clean

*Follow the FitNuts challenges - I spent some time today putting all the  challenges in my calendar. Boom. There is it. 

*Run 35 miles (minimum) this month.

*Be kinder to myself. 

So here we go - September as  FitNut. I have a most awesome team-within-the-team in Jenn, Stacy and Lindsey. (Team 8!)

August Challenge!!

I'm a day late, of course, because isn't that my style? :-) 

So my August challenge started, duh, August 1. 

July challenge results: I lost a lb from July 1. 

But since I was injured I will take it. 

BUT - August? August is MY month.  My official weigh IN weight was 156.5. LOW for me lately, but I am really ready to kick it into gear. I have another awesome partner (my friend Stacy) who has already motivated my butt to get moving this month! 

I am making it a goal to run several times a week - I am going to be running the Halloween 10K again (third year in a row!) with my friend Courtney and I am PSYCHED! I also signed me and my hubby up for the Color Run in St Louis coming up. And kids 5 and under run free - so both of my kids are coming with us! They will be SO psyched :-)  Not running it, obviously, but it will still be an awesome family time for us.

I'm excited that we're camping more often. I can usually max out at 10K or more steps on camping trips, even just walking to and from the bathroom with my kiddos. I'm sure I cancel that out with the amount of beer I drink when we camp, but I still think it counts for something.

This week:

I ran 2.25 miles on Thursday. (11:25 pace)

I ran 1 mile today (10:28 pace)

Here's to speeding my pace up this month. 

Here's to losing the last few pounds that are hanging around  (I'm 156.5 this am; would like to get to 153!)

Here's to cleaning up my eating - not necessarily to completely "clean" eating, but to eating what is good for me. Eating what I know fuels my body, not necessarily what tastes good. 

Pinterest!

So here goes nothing! I am ready, dedicated and super busy this month. Plus my BABY starts KDG in 10 days. TEN DAYS I will have a kid in elementary school. It blows my mind how fast time is going. And all I really want is to be healthy for my family. I always tell them they are stuck with me forever and I want to make good on that one! 

Accommodation

I am making accommodations for myself. I am swimming to get some physical activity. I spend about an hour at a time in this lane in the pool (I am a creature of habit - I MUST be in THIS lane!) And I'm watching my calories SO closely!

We've gone back to a lot of clean eating.  Meals this week have been primarily veggies.

Monday I made a chicken dish. I used all tomatoes from our garden ( we have a CRAZY tomato plant garden this year! ).  I added chicken broth to the pan, fresh thyme/basil (from my herb garden), tons of tomatoes, a handful of chopped zucchini, several mini sweet peppers. Right before I served it, I threw in about 1-2 Tbsp whipped cream cheese. It gave the sauce a little more body. I tossed this mixture with brown rice noodles and away we went. Delicious! 

Tuesday night was a lovely burger with smoked white cheddar cheese and a bit of bacon. A sliced tomato from the garden. Corn on the cob. "Superfood" kale salad! 

Thursday night we had portobello pizzas. I've made this before, but tonight's topped ALL of them! I grilled the mushrooms first with just a touch of coconut oil. I layered them with pizza sauce, cheese, sauteed spinach and turkey pepperoni and grilled them until they were melty and delicious.  We had it with a salad and corn on the cob. Soooo yummy!

This morning I skipped my normal 1-2 cups of coffee in favor of this smoothie. I've talked about the amazing smoothie before but looking back, I realize I never shared the recipe!  I found it in a Tosca Reno cookbook. I found the recipe online here. I can take or leave the honey in the recipe, but it's sooooo delightful with the honey that I never ever leave it out!

Monday I am going to see an ortho about my leg. Of COURSE the pain is nearly non-existent now... But I am still going to go meet with him and find out what I did, if he can tell me. There is still pain here and there so I definitely don't think I am completely healed.  And hopefully I'll get the all-clear to start running again! 

Until then, I will keep swimming. I think we're planning to go on a family bike ride this weekend. I have a virtual race to do, so maybe a bike ride race is what I'll have to do in my current condition! 

Challenge Day 1

So I'm not even officially sure all the things I need to do for this challenge, but boy am I ready! 

This morning my alarm went off at 4:30. I sat up, ready for a run, until - I realized it's DARK at 4:30am. And I 'm a wuss - no running in the dark for me! So I went back to sleep and didn't wake up until too late to run. 

BUT I did have a solution. I worked today (weird because I don't' work on Mondays!) but after work I headed straight to the gym and my favorite kickboxing class! Booya 700 calories! 

I drank my required water too, 5x15 oz glasses at work, a bottle at kickboxing and a glass of water with dinner! 

So far I'm kicking butt. Here's hoping I can get up and run tomorrow! Jen and I are eating at a restaurant called CHEESEOLOGY tomorrow, which is probably as fattening as it sounds :-) So hopefully I can get a good run in the morning to justify some of those yummy calories. 

My official first weigh in weight: 159.
Goals: Hoping to get back to comfy weight of 153 by mid-July and maybe even 150 by August 1. 

Majority says...

Find something new. 

Thanks for all of the responses, support and advice after my last post. The resounding majority of you said it's time to find something new, it's obvious I'm not happy.

So now I just need to brainstorm what I can do that will fit into that 4:30am time slot and will make me happy.  I'm toying with the idea of running (although my neighborhood is NOT good for running - running the whole thing only gets me about a mile, a mile and a half TOPS, before I start doing circles.)  I also have a few games on the Wii that I could do - Zumba, Biggest Loser, Pilates. 

So this week I am going to get back to getting up early (although I am off the majority of the week because my baby girl turns FIVE on Wednesday!) and trying out different things. I definitely plan on hitting the gym a few times, hopefully for some of my very favorite classes like kickboxing and cardio circuit. 

I need to get my eating in line again.  I log everything in MFP  but most days I'm over the allotted calories. After this week, I am going to sit down and start meal planning again.  I stopped at the store and bought massive amounts of veggies this week. My goal is to stop keeping such strict track of everything and to try moderation. I'm NOT good at moderation, if you haven't noticed. I need goals, number like goals, or else I just lose track of what I am supposed to be doing.    I am going to continue to track on MFP, I will start working out, but I'm no longer going to keep track of the other things I was tracking (sleep, water, drinks, etc).  It was just too much to keep up with. It's one thing to be accountable to someone, it's another to be so bureaucratic about it. 

I did register for the Halloween 10K the other day. My awesome friend C is going to come in and run it with me! Our tentative plan is to dress up as Super Moms. Our costumes will rock. My goal is sub 60. But since I haven't run since the Run in Color run in Evansville - who knows if that's realistic. I had an opportunity to run this morning when the kids were playing at the playground and it was REALLY not appealing to do it! I guess we'll see this week. :-) 

I went with Jen to try on my bridesmaid dress. You know, the one we ordered in February, before I started working, when I was at the gym 4 days a week, 2 hours a day...  Needless to say, it fit a BIT differently than it would have.  I can zip it (thankfully) but I certainly can't breathe when it's zipped. And I don't like the way it bunches around my waist/hips. So that is my motivation for the next 63 days. I even told my boss I was going to have the photo printed and put it in her candy drawer! Gentle reminders! :-) 

This picture is from last spring, but same bikes!

We did go on a lovely family bike ride today.  My husband took my son in the trailer and I had my daughter on the trail-along bike. It's not a bad workout, especially when she's "helping" ;-)  We went about 3 miles then stopped at the park and let the kids play. Then we headed back the same way but passed the car for an additional 1.5 miles. All told, our ride was 9 miles in about 55 minutes. Not speedy but we were out.  Hubby did make the observation that the calorie burn compared between running and biking is NOT comparable at all - it was about 260 calories for a 55 min ride.  NOT super athletic but I'm glad we got to go out as a family!

Gosh she looks so little here!

Day 5. Slipping but not drowning.

• Bedtime will be 9pm on Monday, Tuesday, & Wednesday.  n/a, yay weekends!
• Alcohol will be two nights a week (it's been getting a little out of hand! Definitely part of the lbs being packed on!) Wine tonight. This is night two and I guarantee I will be having something tomorrow night because we are having a bbq with friends, so fail. But see two bullets down....
• If I miss a day of working out, I WILL NOT throw in the towel 
• Same as above, if I don't keep a PERFECTLY clean day, I will NOT take comfort in the candy dish. I'm not giving up just because I slipped on one front!! I forgot to take lunch to work today, thinking I could make it through (hoping for a short day, silly me ;-)  I started shaking around 2:30 and headed out. I was as good as I could be at a grocery store deli - a grilled Asian chicken breast and 1/4 lb of poppyseed cole slaw. And a great new snack, these yummies! 
• Goal: 15,000 steps/day. If it means I march around my house for an hour before bed, so be it. Bwahahaha. Amendment: 10,000. Even still, I'm at 6692 right now. Probably not hitting 10K today either! But here's to a weekend of family fun!

Friday: Off

I DEFINITELY took my rest day seriously today. My back is so sore and achy... I just can't stand the thought of this taking weeks to heal, so I am really hopeful that I can kick the pain sooner rather than later. Aleve, muscle cream and hot water have helped so far. 

Just hoping to be able to get back to Insanity tomorrow, but let's be honest - if my back hurts, I'm not going for it. But it is the weekend and we can probably find the time to take a nice long walk as a family, which could get me to my 10K steps for sure!

The good news? I weighed in at 161.5 on Monday. This morning I weighed in at 157.5! So the changes I've made are obviously working.  I just need to stick with them long enough that they become routine! 

Accountability (AKA What I Need)

I need to get my butt in gear. Seriously people, I weighed in at 160 this week. NOT a pretty sight. I am going to make this a priority now.

New Rules

• Bedtime will be 9pm on Monday, Tuesday, & Wednesday. 
• Alcohol will be two nights a week (it's been getting a little out of hand! Definitely part of the lbs being packed on!)
• If I miss a day of working out, I WILL NOT throw in the towel 
• Same as above, if I don't keep a PERFECTLY clean day, I will NOT take comfort in the candy dish. 
• Goal: 15,000 steps/day. If it means I march around my house for an hour before bed, so be it. 

Monday: Circuit & Kickboxing

Tuesday: Insanity AM

Wednesday: Insanity AM

Thursday: Insanity AM or during the day

Friday: Off

Saturday: Run

Sunday: Insanity

My reality check for the day: 

June 9, 2013

Heck, forget a year ago. Here's a few WEEKS ago:

So it'll take me longer, since I'm working now. 

Scheduling will be critical to my success. Working only 20 hours a week seems like I should be able to work out before or after work without getting in the way, but I am NOT a morning person so going to the gym before 8 is probably a no-go.  I tried leaving work at 2pm on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, but I CAN'T do it. I have a problem leaving work in the middle of a project. And around 2pm? I seem to ALWAYS be in the middle of something! 

So I will set an alarm. Maybe 2.

I WILL get up those mornings at 4:30 and do Insanity. 

I WILL get back to clean eating so that I can stop feeling like gross trash. 

I can't keep being surrounded by people who are rocking it without doing my fair share of rocking. So here goes. I miss being one of the rock stars. It's time to ditch the lazy attitude I've had and the bad eating habits. It's time to feel GOOD again and I am the ONLY person who can make that happen.  

I know I CAN do it. I just need to get up and go to actually ACCOMPLISH it. And I will. I've lost 30+ lbs in the last 2 years. Staying at goal weight has been the hardest part of the whole journey!

So here's to goals. And dreams. And being healthy. And teaching my KIDS about healthy eating and a healthy lifestyle!

Insanity Day 3: Cardio Power & Resistance

I survived. 

(the end)

Adjusting.

 I started a job on April 1. I haven't worked since before my (almost 5 year old) daughter was born! It's been a huge adjustment for me but it has been WONDERFUL! I am only working part time, so I have Mondays and Thursdays off. It's SO HARD to learn how to get my kids out of the house. Of course, my early risers have been sleeping in, so we're rushing. Thankfully our daycare is amazing and will feed them breakfast too if we have to run out of the house fast!

That said, I have NOT yet figured out how to fit working out into my routine. I have been single-parenting this week while my hubby is out of town for business, so TIRED is the name of my game. I know I can find things to do at home. I want to try Insanity. I know there are dvds and YouTube videos I can follow. I just lack the motivation right now!

We are still trying to eat as cleanly as possible.  We've had a few awesome winning recipes lately for sure! I made Sweet & Sour Chicken a few weeks ago but had to grill the pineapple separately for my no-fruit-in-my-dinner hubby (I love you, dear!). Then Jen and her fiance came over last night and I made it again. My kids have DEVOURED it each time I've made it! Here is the recipe. The only thing I don't do is add cilantro, simply because I never have it on hand!

So my FAVORITE preparation of salmon is the way my step dad has always made it - a rub of brown sugar, cumin and paprika. Obviously brown sugar is out of our diet so I haven't been sure of how to adjust. Then we tried the coconut sugar awhile back and it has a great brown sugar flavor, so I decided to give it a try. And it WORKS! It has the same caramelizing effect that the brown sugar has on the salmon when grilled and the flavors are spot on! The rest of the plate is a whole wheat spaghetti noodle with avocado sauce and maple/bacon Brussels sprouts!

Smoked turkey, mashed potatoes & sauteed zucchini & baby bella mushrooms!

Jamie Eason's turkey meatloaf, sauteed baby bella mushrooms, corn and mashed potatoes!

Stuffed green peppers (with turkey & brown rice), lots of green beans & a salad

 This is what I've been lovingly calling "Callista Cake." I have this awesome friend who is a complete and total inspiration who introduced me to this recipe. She blogs at Run And Lift Like a Land Shark. I am hoping to get her to summarize her journey for us, but all you need to know is she's lost 100lbs, has run a marathon and now is training for a figure competition!! She's my hero and I really look to her for inspiration!! She posted this recipe here as Casein Cake. (I use whey protein, but it's easier for me to call it Callista Cake) ;-)

I have yet to PERFECT this cake. I just did some googling tonight to learn more about coconut flour, which I am new to using. I found this site, saying you should be using 1/4 to 1/3 cup coconut flour for every 1 cup of whole wheat flour. So I got CLOSE last time, but mine is always so cakey and dry. I think I can remedy that next time I make it by either using LESS flour or more eggs/coffee!  I have had it three times and have topped it each time with chocolate chips and unsweetened coconut flakes. Yummmmmmmm!!