Slow....

Slow progress. Slower results. More backsliding. 

I was on a good clip in November... hit my lowest weight since I had Miss M, but fell right back into bad habits and lost it. 

I printed out the first week of Jamie Eason's Post Pregnancy training tonight. It's all stuff I can do at home, while M naps or plays in her jumperoo. It's been hard to get to the gym regularly, trying to balance the schedules for both the big kids in school, plus sports. I have a hard time shutting down and going to bed early. I have a wicked sweet tooth. All of these are just excuses, I know. I keep waiting for that moment when we fall into a routine, but it just isn't happening.  There's always something "extra" going on that messes with our schedules, if even just holidays and special events. 

I've been doing a decent job on water (have really focused on getting 100+ oz a day) and trying to get good food in my system. I have a hard time in the 3-5pm time period. Goal is to keep chugging water at that time instead of stuffing my face. M is sleeping better now, so I feel like I'm coming OUT of the "survival mode" time and it feels like the right time to ramp up my focus and training.  But even if I can only make it to the gym 1-2 times a week, I am hoping that I can get my food choices (primarily the sweets!) under control. 

So... this is just a brain dump. It's been awhile since I posted here so maybe keeping accountable here will help too.    Tomorrow I plan to take my measurements, but I likely won't start the Jamie Eason plan until Wednesday as I have (yet another) project that will take up my "free time" tomorrow. 

Whole30, #2, Days 1-2

Oh the headache on day 1!!

I skipped my coffee because the baby just DOESN'T like it some mornings. BIG mistake. I had a headache so bad I could barely hold my head up most of the day. :(

Add to that my husband's superstition about eating chicken/eggs on NYD.... it was interesting finding food yesterday!

We hadn't made it to Whole Foods for bacon yet, so he threw together a hot dog/potato/red pepper scramble. It wasn't the worst concoction we've ever had but I don't think we'll be rushing to try it again. ;-)  I also had 1/4 of an avocado and half of a grapefruit.

Lunch: 4 baby cucumbers, handful of olives, hot dogs and whole grain mustard. 

Dinner: Crispy carnitas, roasted broccoli, baked potato with compliant salsa. 

Friday was better. I was able to get down about a half a cup of coffee with coconut cream - so far, no headache!

Breakfast: 3 over medium eggs, 1/2 avocado, one cup of blackberries.

Lunch: Baked chicken breast, 1/4 avocado, 2 clementines, about a cup of baby carrots.

Afternoon: 1oz almonds

Dinner: Cracklin' chicken, roasted carrots, roasted potatoes.  This was pretty big as I normally CANNOT STAND cooked carrots. These? They'll be made in my house 1-2 times a week going forward. Delicious!! 

I need to modify just slightly. I am only coming in around 1,000 calories and I JUST don't feel like that's enough while pregnant. Yes, I know the rules, but I am being overly cautious because of my pregnancy.  So I will watch my protein intake (keep it less than 20% of my total daily macros), calories and calcium. So I will be adding a fourth meal and possibly a snack after dinner just to make sure I'm hitting 1500+ calories. 

Confession.

That should read "confession." 

Because I've realized that the only person putting pressure on myself to complete a Whole30 - is me. 

I stopped my Whole30 last week. Friday, to be exact. It was a hard week. A REALLY hard week. And all I wanted was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. (sidebar: for our family, that is sprouted grain bread, peanuts-only peanut butter and jelly with no added sugar.) But nothing in that is "Whole30" approved. So instead, I would wander around the house, wringing my hands trying to find something that was "acceptable" to eat. Some days, I was hitting 800 calories eaten (not counting the calories I expended through exercise.)  And it hit me. A pb&j at our house isn't an "unhealthy" meal and yet it was STILL not ok on Whole30. And I don't understand that. Maybe it's my emotions this week, but maybe, just maybe, I need to start rethinking why I am doing this. 

This time in particular, I feel very disordered in my thinking. I "quit" my Whole30 on Friday, yet almost all of my meals have been compliant since, with very few exceptions. I ran 10 miles on Sunday with Sara and had a minor panic attack when faced with eating a Jimmy Dean egg white/turkey sausage english muffin in the 15 minutes I had to eat before church. The thought of eating the English muffin scared me. I had half (I gave Little Guy the top muffin). I am easing back into grains, it's getting easier, but it bothered me how much different my experience was this time than last.  

I just saw this article on FB. It spoke to me, volumes.  I am still struggling with what "healthy" eating means to me. Like the author of this article, I don't have allergies or intolerances to any particular food or food group.  I don't have an autoimmune disease that will benefit from a paleo lifestyle. And I do have extreme guilt and shame about my food choices when I "break the rules." For now, Whole30 is going on the back burner and I'm working on my mental health. 

I may revisit a Whole30 - maybe during a less emotional/stressful time in my life. It IS a good process and it does have a ton of benefits, but for me, right now in my life - I just need to refocus and get my head right first. 

So I won't apologize - like I said, I have realized the only person I have disappointed is myself (I don't quit things!). And if you're considering a Whole30 - do it. Because you never know how you will do until you try it. Don't let my experience discourage you. My first Whole30 was awesome and someday - I will succeed again! 

Tomorrow  - stats from Sunday's 10 miler!

One Third Done!

Day 10!! 1/3 of the way done!! 

Feeling great. Emotional today for reasons unrelated to my food. I definitely had a nightmare last night that I mindlessly ate a forkful of pasta and started yelling because I was so angry I messed up my Whole30! I woke up all angry and moody because of that dream.

Breakfast: Omelette with sauteed peppers and onions. Avocado. Blueberries. 

Lunch: 2 hot dogs, sugar snap peas, applesauce.

Dinner: Jalapeno chicken burgers, sweet potatoes, guacamole and a few plantain chips (I didn't eat all of those) and a side salad with Tessamae's balsamic dressing.

Breakfast: 2 egg/pepper/prosciutto muffins. Blueberries. Power greens. 

Lunch: 1 1/4 jalepeno chicken burgers, grapes, romaine, roasted potatoes. 

Midday: Lara bar

Dinner: Taco salad with meat, tomatoes, black olives.

Spoonful of coconut butter - yum!

Breakfast: 3 egg muffins

Lunch: Taco meat, romaine with a hardboiled egg. Grapes.

Dinner: Salmon (recipe from the Well Fed cookbook), cumin spiced carrots (also from Well Fed), cauliflower rice that I burnt.

My leg is still giving me trouble, but I went to yoga on Tuesday and did a bit of foam rolling and yoga moves (pidgeon anyone?!) tonight. HOping that loosens me up enough to get about 6 miles in tomorrow while my little guy is at school! 

Molly

I THOUGHT I could beat the humidity yesterday. I was out of the house by 6:45, drove to the lake and started my run by 7:11.  The humidity? It BEAT me there!  I had planned to run 6-7 miles, but after a few short moments, I knew I couldn't go that far without water (and I hadn't planned to bring my water belt because I didn't think I would need it on a 6 mile run!) 

I struggled through my first two miles, adding in walking and there wasn't a MOMENT of delightful running feeling. Between the humidity and the cotton I was chewing (seriously, it was ridiculous of me to think I could run without carrying water!! I know that now!) I decided to JUST make it around the lake - if I could JUST make it around the lake that would be approximately 3 miles.  

While I was struggling, I started thinking about my races in October (MO Cowbell and the Halloween 10K!) How I am absolutely determined to PR these races. How much I want to feel that "runner's high" feeling when I cross the finish line, instead of the utter despair I was feeling currently.   I thought back to a time when I felt great working out - when it seemed to come "easily" (although let's be honest, it doesn't come easily, we work harder and it gets easier). 

And I landed on a time I remember DISTINCTLY during my Whole30.  April 23, day 25 of our Whole30. I was on day 58 of the Jamie Eason LiveFit Training.  

I remember doing the preacher curl then getting down for my (dreaded) pushups. And then, I remember being SHOCKED that 12 REAL pushups - you know, on my toes and coming down to 90 degrees - were actually manageable. Forget manageable, it was - dare I say - easy?!

 That moment is the ONE that I look to with fondness during my Whole30.  The fuel I was putting in my body was actually helping me - making me stronger!  I was able to lift heavier, feel less pain afterwards and my whole performance was increased. 

Fast forward to this past week:

• Emotional highs and lows. 
• Exhausted by afternoon (requiring either more coffee or a nap!). 
• CRABBY. 
• Body aches and pains. 
• Binging. 

The dreaded "daily life" symptoms of a poor diet.  

So as much as I DESPISE (and boy do I despise it!) doing Whole30, I think I need to find a way to get there. ASAP.  

I have these races that I have paid for coming up. I paid good money, I am beginning my running training.... but why on this good green Earth would I waste time training if I don't bother to put the fuel in my body that I KNOW will help me perform my best?   

I don't suspect it will help, I don't wonder. 

I KNOW. 

Because I've done it. 

I wish I could be one of those people who understands and thrives on moderation, but it's just not a concept that I understand.  I'm rules, I'm a black and white guideline person.  

I haven't decided if I am going to do a strict Whole30 or just "clean eating."  If you've been following along, I was at my lowest weight back when we did clean eating (lowest body fat % too!) but lately it's just SO HARD for me to put that much effort in. In that respect, Whole30 is easier. Here are the foods you can eat, eat them.   So I'm going to spend the next few days talking with my husband, figuring out what I want to get out of this (increased athletic performance!! emotional stability!) and go from there. 

So to get to where I want to be - what do I want to do? What am I willing to do?  I've given up sugar and wine and pasta for a month before, what's stopping me now?? It's all me, all in my head. And now it's time to get OUT of my head!

Until then, drink up the wine! 

Here we go again!!!

I miss this chick...

 I have felt like COMPLETE crap since my Whole30 ended. I've posted a few times, I've wallowed a lot more than that. I feel like I have no willpower now.  I don't even track my food obsessively in MFP anymore - because Whole30 was SO freeing about not doing it.  But when you're eating cheese and crackers, pasta and drinking half and half - and let's not get started about the amount of alcohol I've been drinking - tracking becomes MUCH more important.

I miss the clear headedness. I miss waking up refreshed. I miss not having any sore joints. I FELT stronger. I FELT thinner/less bloated and my head felt clearer.

Almost everyday I wake up and think "I'm going to eat Whole30-like today" and I immediately break it when I pour half and half into my coffee. Or when I lick the knife I just used to make my daughter's peanut butter sandwich.  Then I figure, "I slashed one tire, let's take care of the other three!"

So instead of beating myself up, mentally then at the gym, physically. . . instead of feeling guilt and denial that my eating DOES affect my life -- I'm going to DO something about it. I'm learning the truth - you really CAN'T outrun a bad diet!!  I can burn 500 calories or more a day in a workout, but if I come home and drink beer, eat chips and gorge on pasta - I might as well have stayed home.

Tomorrow I will start a Whole14. Just two weeks, 14 days, of "Whole30" eating.  I will go back to the basics of it.  Then, maybe on the flip side when I remember how GOOD it feels and how I DO have the willpower -- maybe then I can stick with something MODERATE.

I have 10 workouts left in the Jamie Eason training.  I apparently don't know how to deadlift because I hurt my neck on Tuesday doing them. I was out of commission yesterday. I PROBABLY could have gone back today but we had other things for school to get done. Tomorrow, I will head back.  Once I'm done with this training I am so excited to start running again. Maybe I'll start using all of those interval running workouts I have pinned on Pinterest! And of course, after a 12 week lifting program, I will be continuing with my training.

But for tonight, I drink up. 

Whole30 Eve

Tomorrow is the day.  We are starting Whole30 tomorrow morning. 

After church, we are heading to Costco to pick up a few last minute items - eggs, pork tenderloins, a few more veggies. 

Mentally, I'm ready.  I'm bracing myself for the detox this week. I plan to write down my thoughts as the weeks go on and will post them here as a check in. Tomorrow I will be taking measurements and pictures, weighing myself for the last time (my husband said he is throwing away my scale! Yikes!)  and generally mourning what I used to be.

And having a big ole celebration for what we will become! 

While I am excited to try recipes from Well Fed and Well Fed 2, I think this first week, we'll be doing a lot of the "hot plates" instead of full blown meals. Cooking up a lot of ground beef and chicken breasts, "steam sautéing" veggies then mixing and matching for the week. 

So while the list of things that I will miss is long --

• wine
• half and half
• cheese
• rice
• tortillas
• baked potatoes

-- the list of  benefits (health and beyond!!!)  FAR outweighs all of those things combined. 

I absolutely am excited for this.  I can't believe we're doing it  - all of us, even my kids!  Although I know my daughter has a birthday party next weekend. How do I control what she eats at a sleepover?  I mean, I can't. Part of the reason I want to do this is to see if getting her away from dairy to see if it helps her allergies - but going to a sleepover where I am about 90% certain they will serve pizza for dinner and cereal for breakfast?  How do I even influence this?   

This month will be a lot of navigation for us. Leading my son away from his breakfast cereals, my daughter away from cheese & crackers in her school lunch....  I just don't know how it's all going to go!!  Daily navigation. DAILY. 

For now, I will be having the rest of my wine tonight and starting fresh tomorrow. 

Whole30 here we come.

Whole30 Date & Another Leg Day

Well, we have an official start date for Whole30 - March 30.  My mom is visiting and she said that if we waited until she was here, she'd do it with us! Here's me holding her to that promise! <3  I have several other friends that have said they were interested in joining us too - You know who you are ;-)  Maybe we'll have to start a FB page or a weekly check in post! 

Tomorrow is leg day again. This week in Jamie Eason's training, one extra day of training is added to the weekly plan. It's a repeat of the muscle group that's "lagging."   My legs aren't lagging, but as a runner, I'm mostly interested in growing the strength there.  So tomorrow is leg day again. 

My legs still hurt from Monday. 

On the off chance I can WALK normally tomorrow, I can't wait to have another four days of pain! Yippee! :-) 

I had a shining moment today, a big NSV for me and moreover, a MENTAL win.  I was at the grocery store picking up a few things I needed to make lettuce wraps (Zomg, you must try them!) and I wandered past the refrigerated coffee creamers.  I thought to myself "I won't be able to have this anymore - maybe just one more before I'm done."  Then something struck me and I was able to put it back. I thought "You have ALREADY detoxed from this - WHY would you add it back to your diet only to have to pull it out again??!!"  

 Seriously - this is going to be challenging enough. And I have full understanding that my life is NOT over because of this meal plan. I am hoping that the proof is overwhelming after 30 days that I FEEL better and I AM better because of the fuel I am putting in my body. I am already drooling over so many of the recipes we've looked at that I honestly can't wait to get started!  It will be an adjustment! I want my family to benefit, but I don't know how my carb loving kiddos will react when I tell them no more breakfast cereal, crackers at lunch or rice with dinner!   But one thing I have always believed and have stuck to - if it's on your plate, you try it - and I am NOT a short order cook. I make one meal for the family, take it or leave it.  So I will either come out the other side of this with amazingly adventurous little eaters or some VERY hungry little people!! 

Next few weeks, I will spend time trying to ease carbs out of my life gradually so that April 1 isn't a shell shock. I've already started loading my plate up with more veggies than anything else, most night passing on whatever starch/carb is being served.  My afternoons - lunchtime to before dinner - does NOT look like that, but I am working towards it. 

Baby steps!

Powering Through!

I had my pity party last Thursday.  I spent Friday with my kiddos. 

And just as I promised, I went to the gym and KILLED my shoulder workout on Saturday. 

Obviously the 75 calorie burn kind of dismays me, but I know I'm building muscle and burning more over the course of a day than if I wasn't focusing so much. 

Monday was chest/triceps and boy did it hurt my arm. But I powered through. I may look like a moron lifting 3lb dumbbells with my left arm and 25lb dumbbells with my right......  but I am DOING it!

 Biceps hurt a lot to lift with my arm still injured, but again, I lighten up more than I would normally and I make it through.  This one took me a long time yesterday. I was taking my full 45-60 second breaks between my sets to make sure I was giving my arm time to rest. I feel good today, though!

Leg day. Eternally my favorite. There is something that changed when I started running - I grew muscles in places in my legs that I didn't know muscles were supposed to exist! I remember finding one bulge in a place I'd never seen and asking my husband if it looked swollen. "No, honey, those are muscles!"   Huh. Interesting!    So basically, leg/calf day - ALWAYS my favorite. Starting next week, I will be adding a day of workout. You are supposed to add to what you lack, however I just want to do more leg work! 

So that brings me up through day 11.  Excited to power through the next few weeks and get to a place where I can legitimately add cardio (I snuck in a 5 min warmup - 1/2 mile - today!)  Proud of myself to keep it up, but definitely need to focus more on cleaning up my eating habits!

Let's Try Again - Jamie Eason Day 1 - Tri/Chest

I did Jamie Eason's LiveFit trainer, day 1, AGAIN today. 

My weights were drastically different. 

Doing flyes last week with 10lbs, 5 this week.  

Dumbbell bench presses with 15 last week, 7.5 this week.  

I feel like I could have pushed myself MORE but I also don't want to blow out my arm my first day back. 

And surprisingly, this afternoon, my arm feels BETTER.  

What kind of crazy business is this?! I haven't had the throbbing, dull, constant pain today that I've had for a week now. Who would have thought I NEEDED to lift to make it better?! 

So back to the grind. Day 2 tomorrow, Day 3 on Wednesday then I will have to sneak Day 4 in sometime either in the evening or this weekend, since my daughter is off school on Friday. 

So hurray for good news, finally! I'm working on getting my eating back in check after a desperately horrible food weekend.  

Tonight's dinner is my very favorite -  Tamari Honey Chicken with Broccoli & Almond Butter Sauce. 

Have you ever found that working out actually helped an injury for you?   Still so surprised at how today went!

Protein Crazy!

So I've tried to focus on my macros more this week. I'm still at 166 with no movement, so I'm hoping if I start to actually focus on the the specific nutrients, maybe I can get the scale moving!

Here are my macro calculations according to my weight and loss goals: 
As you can see, my protein is astronomical. At least, for someone who barely ever breaks 100g of protein a day - see evidence A below, my protein intake for the last 90 days!

Evidence A

I have no earthly clue how to git fit this much protein into my day.  Today was the closest I've come, obviously according to the chart above - and I really feel like I CANNOT eat like this daily

Today, I had:

• 1 cup greek yogurt with flax and honey
• Tuna salad with 2 egg whites in it
• Smoothie with 2 scoops of protein powder
• 10oz of Salsa chicken
• 6 oz greek yogurt, 1 scoop protein powder, flax 

I hit 190 g of protein. Of course, when I work out MyFitnessPal adjusts my totals so my goal is 246 for today - how is this POSSIBLE without eating an entire cow?!? Seriously, I feel like I ate a ton at dinner - 10oz of chicken!! - and it didn't get me close! 

I won't lie - where is says "REPEAT" at the bottom?
I actually told the screen to eff off. 

Anyhow, I am feeling more and more fit again, which is making my heart happy. I love being back at the gym but I'm also finding ways to work out from home and incorporate my kiddos.  I found an awesome HIIT workout on Pinterest that I did yesterday at home. 



My little guy is home with me during hte day and so he did this workout "with" me.  Although during the squats (about 30 in) he said "Mama, this hurts my bones!!"    He lasted until about the first pushup, then he went about playing around the room while I finished up :-) 

Tonight, I did this awesome treadmill workout. I had to adjust the speeds down by about .5 after awhile, but I was able to keep with it until 44 minutes!

So here's to a good final weigh in. I won't be able to join my FitNuts next month but I'm hoping to keep the momentum going on my own, while staying in touch with the main page!

Spinning tomorrow!! Excited to see the results from the HRM when I take the class!

Adios, 2013! Bring on 2014!

So thankful for this past year. It's been wonderful!

After my "no cares" December, I weighed in on Jan 1 at 170 (ouch). I haven't been this heavy since November 2011.  I decided it was time to get serious. I resigned from my job 12/19, I have had a wonderful break with my kiddos, but now ? It's time to get serious.

I joined a FitNut challenge again.  Very excited to be back amongst people who are like-minded and ready to change their lives. Even after just 3 days of watching my calories, keeping tabs on my macros and drinking enough water, I sneaked a look at the scale and I'm down 2 lbs already. Now if I can just keep my momentum!

I got a Garmin Forerunner 110 for Christmas. I am ITCHING to get out and run or at least head to the gym and see it in use!   Looking forward to my 500+ calorie burning workouts.

Here's my goal shirt - Next Christmas, I'll be wearing this Believe shirt all over town - and rocking it.  Because you know what? I KNOW I can do it, I DO believe in myself.  Healthy me, here I come. 

So back to clean eating, about 80% of the time. I am going to be working out a responsible number of times - I'm going to try not to let myself get to the obsessive point I reached last January.  I am definitely trying to get back to the 150s and to near 20% body fat.

And I'm ready to be a better me!  Here I go. Back to 150 for me!

Update: Freezer Meals

I haven't COOKED A MEAL in over a week. It's glorious! 

Of course last week was Thanksgiving and we were out of town.   

But Monday before Thanksgiving we had the BBQ chicken. We put the chicken (shredded thanks to cooking so long!) on top of baked potatoes with a little sour cream - delish! 

We spent Sunday getting out all of our Christmas things so I knew we needed a good crock pot meal so we didn't have to focus on dinner.  We had the Curry chicken with basmati rice and homemade naan (frozen last time we had tikka masala).  

• Consensus was that it was good. I felt it was lacking a little flavor - maybe a spicy kick? Or salt. I tried adding more salt but it didn't hit the flavor note I was missing. Next time will add a touch of cayenne and maybe only one can of coconut milk instead of two. 

Monday night we had the Beef Pepperoncini sandwiches with fries and salad. 

• The kids thought it was a little spicy, but when you had the meat with cheese and the bread I put it on, the spice was cut for sure. Note: buy the chopped pepperoncinis or cut the stems off beforehand. :-)  I didn't think that through and I wound up burning my fingers trying to pull the stems off right before I served the sandwiches!

Tuesday we had the taco meat (ground beef, taco seasoning - homemade - and a can of rinsed black beans). We added water to the crock pot and let it cook.  About 20 minutes before I served it, I added half a bag of frozen corn to the meat. 

• The kids had seconds AND THIRDS!  I added ground beef that I had frozen before to my meal bag. Next time I will be sure to use unfrozen meat and flatten it out. It cooked the entire day in a lump. Easily remedied by using my potato masher, but the flavor may have been more consistent if it had cooked "crumbled" all day. 

Wednesday we tried the Mongolian Beef.  I sautéed green beans and broccoli with the drippings from the crock pot (mixed with a slurry of 1Tbsp of corn starch with 2 Tbsp of cold water). I served with brown rice. I put everything together in a bowl. 

• Husband and I would have eaten seconds - if I hadn't run out of meat!! I will DEFINITELY double the size of the roast I use next time in each package!  There are NO leftovers of meat from this meal, but we have extra brown rice and veggies.  The kids thought it was "ok" but I don't think it was their favorite of the foods we've tried. For me and hubby, it may be our favorite meal that we've tried so far!

All in all, this has been an EXCELLENT experience. 

What makes it better - ??   

CROCK POT LINERS! 

I've had barely any dishes to do post-dinner and it's been LOVELY. 

I think tomorrow night we will try either the wine/herb chicken or the rosemary honey chicken!  If the rosemary honey chicken is awesome, I may get a beef tenderloin to try with that flavor profile too. 

AFA my fitness - nonexistent now. I lost a total of 4lbs in November. Not too shabby but it's not where I'd hoped to be by December 1st. 

But that will change.

I resigned from my job last week. My last day is December 19th. I am looking forward to being home with my babies again, helping out at my KINDERGARTENER'S school, homeschooling my little guy until he's old enough for official preschool....   It was a hard decision but something that my husband and I agree is best for our family. 

So come January - the fitness/health will be kicking into high gear again. I am looking forward to being healthy about it. There is no doubt, looking back, that I was being unhealthy last Jan/Feb. I was working out 10+ hours a week, being ridiculous with my choices and becoming borderline obsessed with it. I am hopeful that I can keep an awesome balance for me and my little guy. 

So I'm taking December and having fun, enjoying my family and my last few weeks working.  But January - with the rest of the "new years resolution" crowd - I'll be kicking ass and taking names!

Vacation, people!

Back from vacation!! I'll admit, vacation with two small kids isn't as relaxing as I'd hope, but the sun and sand was ahhhmazing!

It was, however, a LOT of indulging in food and alcohol!  I had my first (2) Moscow mules before we even left for the beach. 

Then we started with our "traditional" beach drink - Lime-a-ritas & Grand Marnier!

I did go for a run on Sunday morning. It was short-ish, just 3 miles, but the HUMIDITY! It was killer!!  I feel like I walked outside and started sweating! Decent time, though. 

We ate out a lot. I made decent decisions, for the most part. Especially after I ate Pizza Hut on Monday night. I won't even tell you how MUCH Pizza Hut I ate, because it was disgusting. Let's just say I ate enough that I laid in bed that night trying to figure out if it would be ok to make myself get sick just to get it OUT of my body!  After that night, I pledged to make wiser decisions. Not GREAT but I definitely didn't make that mistake again! Lots of fish and grilled chicken for the rest of the week.

Thursday I went out for a long run - 10 miles! It was a few rough first miles - I bartered with myself a lot. 

"Make it to two miles, then I'll turn around - giving me 4 miles" 

"Ok ok, go for 2.5"  

"if you can run 3, you might as well run 3.5" 

"well heck if you are feeling good enough to hit 3.5, you should definitely be able to make 4.5" 

And so on. I made it 5 miles out and turned around, coming back 5 miles. Not GREAT time, but I'm happy with it. 

I came home and weighed in that night (dumb move) at 168. The next morning, after lots of water, I was down to 164. My final September weigh in was 162.5. A GAIN again!! 

This definitely motivated me for a sprint!! 

I have a half marathon on Sunday so this week I am just trying to eat clean to get myself FEELING good when I run. It's been a ROUGH go the last few times. I can tell as soon as I start running when I haven't been fueling my body properly. I feel out of breath. Bulky. Clumsy. Slow. 

This week starts no caffeine/no alcohol. I am attempting to eat clean, at least 75% of the time.  So far so good. I turned to a run yesterday during stress (that run is in the next blog post!) instead of all.the.food. I am looking FORWARD to my run in the am, if only I can sleep through the night!

Tomorrow starts my next FitNut monthly challenge. I changed teams this time, to mix it up a little.  The physical challenge this month is burpees/planks/pushups. It should be interesting! I plan on doing a plank to fatigue tomorrow, then again at the end of the month to see how much progress I've made. 

And here's to the Fastest, Flattest half marathon this weekend!

Just a reminder to myself & maybe you too!

Someone posted this on my FitNuts challenge page today. 

It's perfect for today - no run and I wanted to (and practically did) eat all.the.things. 

Word of the week: Awesome.

AWESOME fitness week.
Not so awesome food week.

It all evens out, though, right?

That 10 mile run today was in the POURING rain. It was DELIGHTFUL. 

I may only run when it rains from now on. <3

Some awesome things this week: 

I fit into a dress I've had hanging in my closet since 2006. No kidding - 2006. Tags on and everything. I've tried it on a few times a year since then, no go. But Wednesday? Finally, it fit!

Saturday, I got to snuggle the sweetest baby boy ever. He's a teeny peanut and I ALMOST tried to convince my friends to let me "borrow" him. Babies make my heart happy! 


Saturday when I came home and got the mail, I had a package from a FitNut friend.  We were paired up in my first challenge and have kept up with each other ever since. She sent me a freaking HRM!  Today's run was scheduled to be 9 miles, but I went a whole extra mile because I was so excited to see my burn with the HRM! Thanks, Jenn!! 

Color Run next weekend. Vacation right around the corner. Halloween 10K in mid-October. I turn 32 next month.  Big things on my horizon, people. Big things!! Must.keep.focused!

Jen's Hitched! (Oh yea, & some fitness stuff...)

Our very own Jen has had a lot going on in her life :-)  

Most recently (as in, last night) she got MARRIED!!!  It was the most beautiful day and one of the most perfect weddings I've been a part of in my life! <3 

Friday morning, before the festivities, I went to what is NORMALLY the Friday cardio plus class. But the gym is having the room we have class in cleaned and polished (as they do every year) and we were "homeless." Never fear, our awesome trainer Terrie took us - bah bah buuuuuum - OUTSIDE.  It was 86 degrees, felt like 96 and 58% humidity!  Here's what my FitBit told me at the end of class: What it MEANT was "you idiot, why are you outside in this weather?!?!"  teehee. 

That night was the rehearsal dinner (delicious) and the girls and I stayed at a hotel with Jen so we could get up BRIGHT and early on Saturday for girly prep time before her big day.   I warned the girls before the evening started - it's the last day of the month tomorrow morning, which means i have a weigh in. Which means I brought my SCALE to the hotel. Yes ma'am, that's me. Walking through Ameristar casino with my duffle bag full of - scale. 

My final weigh in for August was 158.  I weighed in the first of the month at 156.5. Of course.

The wedding was gorgeous. There was so much love throughout the whole event, it was amazing. Jen has the most awesome parents who went above and beyond to make it an amazing event, a great party and definitely something to remember! 

I ate dinner, I had drinks, I ate TWO pieces of cake! 

And then I weighed in this morning. 

Lower than last month's initial weigh in. 

*face palm*

So.... this month's plan:

*Eat clean - goal - 75-80% clean

*Follow the FitNuts challenges - I spent some time today putting all the  challenges in my calendar. Boom. There is it. 

*Run 35 miles (minimum) this month.

*Be kinder to myself. 

So here we go - September as  FitNut. I have a most awesome team-within-the-team in Jenn, Stacy and Lindsey. (Team 8!)

Helloooooooooo

OMG best weekend ever.

We went camping. I don't know if I've mentioned it, but I definitely was NOT on board with this whole camping thing. I went along with it because my husband desperately wanted to go.  The first time we went was fun, but we got about 1,000 ticks by the end of the weekend. 

Gun shy, the next time we went, I opted for a place with WIDE OPEN SPACES and no hikes! However it was a very popular "float trip" place, which apparently translates into "drunken awful scenes" - or it did across from our campsite!

Not this past weekend. This past weekend was a conglomerate of PERFECT conditions. We met up with friends at the campsite. They were 10 sites down from us.  The state part was amazingly family-friendly (ie, no drunken debauchery), paved (good for toddler bike rides!) and the hiking - OH the hiking!! - was amazing. 

Our site was RIGHT on a creek. Friday AM I skipped my run (although I worked out Mon-Thurs last week, yay!) but still managed to hit my 10K (and then some) steps. 

Saturday we went on a COLOSSAL hike. Obviously we didn't hike 10 miles, my kids never would have made it through that! But I was about about 9K when we ended our hike (2500 when we started) so it was a pretty significant stretch! The views were amazing, we walked through and played in a creek, found crawfish, built a dam, climbed "mountains" and spotted wildlife. NO ticks, thankyouverymuch. 

I swear my daughter was with us too, but since we were with her "best friend," I don't have any pictures of just her :-) 

Even the dog got in on it (This is pretty impressive for a 12 year old golden retriever ;-) He walked himself up there!  He did, however, take the steps down, not the slide. 

I will be definitely going back to this site. In fact, I found myself looking at open dates ASAP to try to get back! This is something "old me" never would have done.  At one point during our hike, I could tell my kids were starting to fade. We all sat down for a snack time and my family went wandering around the water. I knew the trail would meet up with the "go home" loop soon , but I wasn't sure how soon and wanted to see if we could hop on that trail from where we were, instead of continuing on.  So I found a way, across rocks in the river, to get to the other side. Then I climbed the "hill" (I swear it should have been a mountain!) to figure out if the flat part was a trail. "Old me" NEVER would have done that. I would have waited for someone else to figure it out, someone else to go forage ahead to find the path. I would have sat down and waited.  But I'm all about moving forward now. 

So let's do it. Let's move forward!! 

Big few weeks. Our very own JEN is getting married in a few weeks. I still have to fit into that bridesmaid dress, so here's hoping I can shed some lbs before then!  After that, I have a beach vacay coming up. Hoping to be comfortable in my own skin by then, at least. I know I'll never wear a bikini again (you know, because I did once) but I would at least like to be comfortable with myself by the time that happens. 

My daily runs will get me there, I'm sure!!   Here's a quick rundown of my last few runs: 

I've been pretty down on myself for my speed on these runs. Then I remember - I am used to running flat ground or a treadmill. I have been running some HUGE hills lately! I know I am building muscle and challenging myself in ways I haven't before. That makes my slower times a little more acceptable to me.  I did run on a treadmill last week in my circuit class at 9.0 for almost an entire 1:15 minutes! Doesn't sound like a lot? Get on a treadmill going 9.0 and tell me it's short ;-) 

Last week: 

Mon: Lifting, circuit class 

Tues: Run 2.26 miles

Wed: Run 1.02 miles

Thurs: Kickboxing, 60 minutes

Friday: CAMPING. 

I feel PROUD of what I'm doing.