Running, running!

I have been really focusing on running lately, which has changed my general workout schedule. Plus it's the last week of summer !!  My kiddos (BOTH OF THEM!) head back to school next week!

I've gotten a few shorter runs in but now that school is starting, I am going to be hitting the longer runs hard!  My son will be in preschool 2 mornings a week so I'll be running Tuesday/Thursday mornings, plus a long run on the weekends.

This week I ran 2.5 on Sunday and 5 yesterday. I figured out the way to make the miles fly on the treadmill - my Kindle!!  I never thought I could run and read but the Kindle kind of changed all that. I don't have to move physical pages, I can change the font size and the time SERIOUSLY FLEW! I looked down the first time and had already been running for 28 minutes!

So Sunday I'm running with Sara and we are going to get in a 60 minute run.  Sometime next week I'll post the training schedule I hope to follow.  

Starting around Sept 1st, I will be starting another Whole30. I have been following macros for the last few weeks and I'm liking it so far. Except days like today where I TOTALLY miss the mark and have no clue where I screwed up! Yikes!

So here goes nothing. Ramping up the running to get a few PRs come October!!

Molly

I THOUGHT I could beat the humidity yesterday. I was out of the house by 6:45, drove to the lake and started my run by 7:11.  The humidity? It BEAT me there!  I had planned to run 6-7 miles, but after a few short moments, I knew I couldn't go that far without water (and I hadn't planned to bring my water belt because I didn't think I would need it on a 6 mile run!) 

I struggled through my first two miles, adding in walking and there wasn't a MOMENT of delightful running feeling. Between the humidity and the cotton I was chewing (seriously, it was ridiculous of me to think I could run without carrying water!! I know that now!) I decided to JUST make it around the lake - if I could JUST make it around the lake that would be approximately 3 miles.  

While I was struggling, I started thinking about my races in October (MO Cowbell and the Halloween 10K!) How I am absolutely determined to PR these races. How much I want to feel that "runner's high" feeling when I cross the finish line, instead of the utter despair I was feeling currently.   I thought back to a time when I felt great working out - when it seemed to come "easily" (although let's be honest, it doesn't come easily, we work harder and it gets easier). 

And I landed on a time I remember DISTINCTLY during my Whole30.  April 23, day 25 of our Whole30. I was on day 58 of the Jamie Eason LiveFit Training.  

I remember doing the preacher curl then getting down for my (dreaded) pushups. And then, I remember being SHOCKED that 12 REAL pushups - you know, on my toes and coming down to 90 degrees - were actually manageable. Forget manageable, it was - dare I say - easy?!

 That moment is the ONE that I look to with fondness during my Whole30.  The fuel I was putting in my body was actually helping me - making me stronger!  I was able to lift heavier, feel less pain afterwards and my whole performance was increased. 

Fast forward to this past week:

• Emotional highs and lows. 
• Exhausted by afternoon (requiring either more coffee or a nap!). 
• CRABBY. 
• Body aches and pains. 
• Binging. 

The dreaded "daily life" symptoms of a poor diet.  

So as much as I DESPISE (and boy do I despise it!) doing Whole30, I think I need to find a way to get there. ASAP.  

I have these races that I have paid for coming up. I paid good money, I am beginning my running training.... but why on this good green Earth would I waste time training if I don't bother to put the fuel in my body that I KNOW will help me perform my best?   

I don't suspect it will help, I don't wonder. 

I KNOW. 

Because I've done it. 

I wish I could be one of those people who understands and thrives on moderation, but it's just not a concept that I understand.  I'm rules, I'm a black and white guideline person.  

I haven't decided if I am going to do a strict Whole30 or just "clean eating."  If you've been following along, I was at my lowest weight back when we did clean eating (lowest body fat % too!) but lately it's just SO HARD for me to put that much effort in. In that respect, Whole30 is easier. Here are the foods you can eat, eat them.   So I'm going to spend the next few days talking with my husband, figuring out what I want to get out of this (increased athletic performance!! emotional stability!) and go from there. 

So to get to where I want to be - what do I want to do? What am I willing to do?  I've given up sugar and wine and pasta for a month before, what's stopping me now?? It's all me, all in my head. And now it's time to get OUT of my head!

Until then, drink up the wine! 

Transformation Tuesday (on a Wednesday)

(said in WyldStyle's voice, of course...) 

Feb 2011 - July 2014

Sometimes, I just need a reminder of how far I've come. 

Sloth.

Seriously in a phase of sloth in my life.  I haven't worked out in over a week. I haven't watched my food intake *at all.* It's birthday week for my daughter and I have been in crafting and food purgatory. The parade was Friday, which means my house is FULL of Tootsie Rolls and banana Laffy Taffy.... 

but I'm sick of it. I'm sick of myself! I am going to give myself through to slip and have treats, but come Sunday? I'm doing a short Whole30 before a quick road trip with my kiddos. I need to get back to the gym (that will probably not happen until Monday but I'm going to try to make it happen this week).  I have joined a few new fitness motivation groups, but I'm feeling all guilty because I just.don't.care this week. 

I still struggle with binging. And self image. And moderation. Ohhhhh moderation, you are SO elusive to me!! I thought my Whole30 would help, but it obviously hasn't. 

I have been intending to up my cardio work, with two races coming up in October, but I haven't yet. After we get home from our road trip, it's on! Cardio rat here I come. 

The week we return, my kids are both in summer camp. I am going to try - regardless of the weather! - to get running again. OUTSIDE. This fall, both kids will be in school on Tuesday and Thursday - I will have those days for long runs (oh Heavenly fall long runs!!).  I intend to PR in a SERIOUS way on these races! 

My plan is already to do another Whole30 for the month before the races. It's not a sustainable lifestyle for me, but I can definitely manage it for a month if it's going to get me that PR!! 

So for now, S-L-O-T-H. I am going to get back to it, I really am. This is NOT who I am (except for birthday party week :-)  I'll post about that on Monday because who DOESN'T need to see pictures of another Frozen party ;-) 

I DID IT!

I FINALLY finished the Jamie Eason plan!! (About 2 weeks ago, I've just been slacking on blogging :-) It was definitely an awesome plan!!!  It was intimidating to try things that I haven't done before (dead lifting and using the squat rack!) but it starts out easy (beginner level for sure) and works up.  I started spacing things out a bit at the end, the workouts got longer (1 1/2 hr and more) and I felt like I needed to take some days off to spend more time at home with my family.

I don't think I took before/after pictures, but I can DEFINITELY see an improvement! My favorite "result" - my TRICEP!  It's awesome now! :-)

So, I finished.  My running is in a weird place (I'm much more bulky than I used to be) so I will be spending the next few months focusing again on my cardio.  I am registered for the Halloween 10K and the Cowbell Half Marathon again in October and I am DEAD SET on PR'ing both of them!

Just proud to say I finished the whole program!!!

fat kid on the block...

Man!  I am almost done with the Jamie Eason plan (you know, the 12 week one that has taken me almost 16...??) - just 2 workouts left!  I am getting back to taking some of the awesome cardio classes I used to take and I'm finding that I am so disappointed!!

Not in the classes, those are awesome as always. But in myself! My stamina is in the toilet, I feel like the fat kid in the room in all of them!  I know that I have surely "bulked up" a bit doing this plan but boy, I didn't think I would do it to the detriment of my cardio goals!   I went to my favorite cardio class this am and we did an easy ("easy") one mile run down and up hill.  You would have thought they asked me to run sprints for a half marathon I was so winded and spent! Last one back to the room, heart bursting through my chest, sweat pouring off of me....

I KNOW the lifting has been a great addition to my fitness routine, but now at the end of this plan, I JUST want my cardio back.  I love lifting, proud of myself for lifting heavier and heavier and even more proud of my tricep muscle that is present no matter what...  but now I need to get back to a place where I don't feel like an elephant when I run!!

Crossroads.

I've been sitting here, staring at a blank screen for about a half an hour. I'm researching, reading and thinking through my next steps. 

I've completed a Whole30.  When it was over, I fell off the wagon.  No, I take that back, I swan dove off the sucker.  We left for vacation and never looked back.  I spent a month with little restriction (although I will say, we aren't usually very far from at least a "clean" eating plan) and gained back all of my weight, felt awful, etc. 

So I started another Whole30 (intending to do a "Whole14") last Friday.  Today is Day 5. I'm feeling good, but my anxiety is THROUGH THE ROOF. Not sure if it's W30 related or just life in general.  I had no headaches, I'm getting stuffy again (my whole family got horrible colds about week 2 last time), but I'm having no lightheadedness this time. 

But that brings me to my food today.  Eggs with bacon mixed in, avocado and coffee.  Lunch (was STARVING - had a 570 cal burn workout then took the kids swimming!) 1/2 spaghetti squash with homemade marinara & meatballs, salad with olives and Tessamae's balsamic dressing and a bowl of applesauce with cinnamon.  I made "ice cream" for my kids - frozen watermelon, coconut water and a touch of coconut milk for creaminess. (NOTE: THIS IS NOT WHOLE30 COMPLIANT, even if the ingredients are. It's SWYPO!)  I had some - you know why? Because I'm slowly realizing, I need to learn to live within my guidelines. Maybe finding an amazing delicious summer treat (that isn't "real" ice cream) will help me stop feeling "left out" of all the occasions that there is REAL ice cream.  

I was faced again with one of these situations at dinner. I went to get my co-op produce and left hubby and kids to make dinner. They put together a DELICIOUS chicken salad. My almost-6 year old made most of the salad herself - peeling carrots and shredding them, putting cheese on them and adding olives. When I walked in, she stopped me at the door and, with the saddest eyes ever, said "Mommy -- I accidentally put cheese on your salad."   Now I had two options - 1) try to pick all the shredded cheese off the salad to "preserve" my Whole30 (which would have broken my daughter's heart) or 2) Go with it knowing that I do NOT react to dairy (thank you, first Whole30). I chose #2. Because you know what, sometimes, food will have ingredients that I don't know about. Sometimes I will choose to eat "non compliant" food. Sometimes I will WANT to eat non compliant food. 

So I will continue to eat "Whole30" but I will use the remainder of my 2 weeks to keep my eyes open for opportunities for moderation.  Some accidental cheese, a paleo treat with my kids... 

I just can't continue the cycle I'm on - Whole30, junky eating, Whole30, etc. I don't believe it was intended to be used this way and I want to try to get to the root of my eating issues. I'm hoping to be more MENTALLY aware this time than I was last time. 

Sorry if a lot of this post is rambling - I really don't know where I stand or what my plan is going forward, but getting it "on paper" will really help me!